Are you finished writing all your Christmas cards? I’m not. As usual…
My husband comes into our bedroom yesterday and says, “You’re writing cards? I thought you already did that.” Uh, well, I wrote half of them a week ago when I had a moment to breathe. But, no, I still have about a bazillion to write.
My friend Rosie sums it up like this: There are two kinds of people in this world – those who write and send Christmas cards, and those who don’t. Rosie doesn’t send them. However, a friend of hers, who is in her 90s, will be sending out over 600 this holiday season.
Six hundred…cards…
I get writer’s cramp just thinking about it. And my tongue shrivels up with the thought of licking all those envelopes. Ugh…
Anyway, as I race at a made pace to get my cards done, I know that no matter how many people I send them to, I will miss someone. Why? Because it seems that this is a holiday tradition.
When my mom was still with us, each Christmas season, I would madly be writing, stamping, sealing, and mailing cards, only to get a phone call from her saying, “ I ran into Mrs. So-and-so at the grocery store. She asked if you were okay because she hadn’t gotten a Christmas card from you.”
Grrr…did I mention that I can’t stand Mrs. So-and-so’s?
So I would dutifully send them cards only to run into them at some later date and have them say, “Oh, Michele. I got your card. But you really didn’t have to go to all that trouble.”
No. Trouble. At. All.
ARGH…I can’t win.
And besides this, there will be other people like me who mail their cards at the last minute. Each year, on Christmas Eve, I get a card from someone, and I realize that I haven’t reciprocated. And guess what? If it doesn’t get there by Christmas, it’s just too dang late.
I’ve tried to mail cards to these people. But not anymore. Why? Because it just ends up looking like I’m totally late. Um, which I am. So instead, I do the mature, adult thing.
I blame the post office.
If I run into these people, and they ask if I got their cards, I say that I think so, and then ask if they got mine…
It may seem underhanded at this joyous time of year. But c’mon, there’s just too much pressure to perform!
And they could have gotten lost at the post office, right?
Or chewed up by a stray, rabid dog…
Or stomped on by a reindeer rejected by Santa…
There’s a whole host of reasons why my card never got there.
The fact that I didn’t send one is probably the biggest one…
I recently received my first Christmas letter. You know the ones – where the senders’ lives are the best in the universe and next to them you feel like you completely stink…
I hate those.
But the ones that are honest (Little Johnny was doing okay in school, but then he stayed out all night, so he’s been grounded for the past three months), those I like. Not many people send them, but honesty can be a good thing.
Unless someone asks you if you sent cards. Then, in true holiday tradition, you can plead the fifth.
Michele Wojciechowski, who can’t answer any e-mail right now because she’s frantically scrawling out the last of her Christmas cards, writes “Wojo’s World™” from Baltimore.